Can I Let It Go?
How to eliminate negative thought
I have an annoying habit.
Whenever I start something new or have an idea, I start thinking about the worst possible outcome and then put a lot of effort in planning for such an eventuality. Even in the ‘best case’ scenario, for me, it’s “well, I’ll see if it works”. It’s the ‘if’ in there that’s the kicker. I’m immediately making an assumption the enterprise, whatever it is, isn’t going to, or might not, or probably won’t, ‘work’.
These feelings and scenarios have been trained into me since childhood. Parents and teachers and sometimes peers, attempting to prepare a ‘soft landing’ for me in case things shouldn’t work out. By doing so they’re implying my ‘great idea’ or whatever is unworkable or not possible. This is usually because they don’t understand my thinking or my knowledge.
This is still the case, in adult life if people don’t really understand what it is you want to do, or the context of what you want to do, they go into this ‘advisory’ mode. If they have no idea what you’re setting about or how you might be able to do it, the response is it just won’t happen.
‘We’ as a species are inveterate nay sayers. It’s a built in protection mechanism dating back through evolution aimed at preserving the species. Because it’s ‘natural’ we must ‘over-ride’ those feelings and fears which aren’t relevant in the present age.
Practically everything we do in our lives today has been described as ‘impossible’ before it was done. It was supposedly impossible to run a mile in less than 4 minutes, but now people do it all the time, just like climbing Everest or sending messages through a wire.
But the strongest enemy to our dreams, plans and ideas is ourselves. After all we believe ourselves more than we believe others, so when we tell ourselves, or just imply in our thoughts and feelings, something ‘isn’t going to happen’ we tend to take it on board rather than believing positively in what we are doing or planning to do.
This negative mindset is a guaranteed way of killing off a project or even preventing it from starting in the first place. So what can we do about it?
We have to ‘notice’ what it is we’re thinking and feeling about what we want to do and as soon as we notice any negative thoughts use the phrase “Can I let this go?”. Sometimes we need to do this on a ‘scale of 1 to 10’ where 10 is ‘definitely I already have’ and 1 is a low level ‘maybe’ or a ‘yes – but. . .’. As you repeat the question to yourself on a daily basis or more frequently, you’ll move up to the 10 level.
Try it, it works.
There’s other techniques you can use as well
EFT otherwise known as ‘tapping’ in a certain way to help you ‘let stuff go’. It’s an interruptive technique which stops your negative thoughts in their tracks when you’ve tuned into it.
Ho’oponopono is another (ancient Hawaiian) method you can use to ‘let go’ of all sorts of conditions and circumstances.
Oh, and there’s something else.
You and I usually attach time based targets to the things we plan to do which can exacerbate the fear of it ‘not happening’.
We can use “Can I let this go” to reduce the effect of the target because it’s quite rare an outcome has to be achieved by a specific time and date, and those which do are usually so well planned and systemised, they more often than not ‘happen’ on the right date.
When it isn’t critical or life threatening if it doesn’t complete on a certain date we can ‘let go’ of the date target as well as the fears of it not happening, doing which is highly likely to reduce them as well.
If you’d like to discuss this please do book a call with me free of charge
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